A relationship does not require a search warrant

An interesting topic came about today.

My one roommate, J, is going through a break up.  In result of her unfortunate situation, a lot of new realizations about men have come about. 

Let me set up the scene for you. While J was home for break she obviously visited her boyfriend frequently.  During this visit, something just felt "off."  He was acting shady and as soon as they would have a good night together, the next day he would pull away.  There is definitely something wrong when you sense that your guy feels guilty for having a good time with you.

So while J and her ex were hanging out she asked if she could check her email on his computer.  When she was done doing that, she went to Facebook.  Guys are stupid so naturally he was still logged in.  With her ex sitting beside her, she looked at the new message that was popping up in his notifications.

Turns out, the douche bag was basically sexting a couple girls over Facebook.  There were vulgar messages and references to him being a  "single guy." 

J has a lot more willpower than me.  She told him her stomach hurt and left shortly after.

In that situation, I probably would have threw his computer at him, cut off his balls, and fire bombed his house.

Disgusted with his behavior, J stopped answering his phone calls and blatantly ignored him for the next few days.  When he started asking questions, she finally admitted what she saw on his facebook.

The BEST part about this whole thing is that his defense is that  J went through his facebook so that NEGATES the fact that he was SEXTING other girls.

No. No. No. No.

This is not Law and Order people.  Just because you don't have a search warrant, doesn't mean the evidence cannot be held against you!!!!!

I'm not saying that in every relationship you should have the right to go through someone's shit all the time.  BUT sometimes the temptation is there.  Girls have pretty good intuition and the reason that J went through it is because she was having a weird feeling about the way her ex was acting.  Not saying it's right.  BUT when you find something in order to prove you right about the weird feeling, there is no turning back.

Trusting someone is a scary thing.  In a relationship, you should trust them enough that you don't feel obligated to check his texts or facebook messages.  When that doubt creeps up though, it's pretty damn tempting.  If you are having that doubt, try talking to your guy first.  If he tries to bullshit you, do what you have to do to find out what's going on.  Woman intuition is usually right.

So guys, get a new defense.

The conversation shouldn't go like this:

Crazy girl: OMG I CANT BELIEVE YOU WOULD SEND HER A PIC OF YOUR PENIS VIA FACEBOOK?

Douche bag guy: WTF...you were on my FACEBOOOK:???? I can't believe it! I THOUGHT YOU TRUSTED ME. YOU ARE THE BAD GUY.

Ladies, don't let the men pull this one on you.  Apologize for invading his privacy, but don't feel guilty for finding out he was being unfaithful or lying to you.  Some men will try to manipulate you and always turn the blame on you.  DON'T LET THEM DO THAT.


Happy Facebook stalking and privacy invading! :)

C