A few days ago in class our professor had us do a Q&A. We could write anything down on a notecard we wanted for him to answer, personally or professionally. One of the questions was, "What is the most important piece of advice you would give us?" He answered with, "fall in love, and if you haven't found it yet, seek love actively."
Beautiful right?
Naturally because I am an emotional basket case, I teared up.
Knowing a brief history about my professor, he is divorced and always mentions his new girlfriend. He also tells his horror stories about his ex girlfriends in the past. He has obviously been through a lot, but still beleives in love.
So I started to ponder this thought. I want to fall in love more than anything in the world. I really really want it. So bad that it hurts. I try to force it with people who aren't right for me and even started this blog dedicated to the drama that comes along with trying to find your other half.
The question I have is.......how do I actively seek love? What does that really mean, especially in today's society? Does actively seeking love mean going to the bars? Getting on match.com?? Putting an add on craigs list?? Wearing a sign around my neck that says SINGLE AND DESPERATELY LOOKING??
I'm not sure what "actively seeking" love means these days. I feel like I've tried all of those things, and for some unknown reason I just haven't found it yet.
That brings me to the other side of the spectrum. Don't people always say that when you aren't looking, you'll find it. Well how does that work??? Do I just give up and stop "actively" searching. How do I just nonchalantly find love without really looking??
I feel like that advice is pretty bogus. I truly believe that you can't force love and that it will happen in the most unexpected places. BUT I also believe that you have to be prepared and ready for it when it comes. If I'm just sitting on twitter by myself every night (which is sometimes accurate), then how am I going to find someone? Prince charming isn't going to fall out of the sky.
So while I don't think you can force love and make it happen in a split second, I think I agree with my professor. You do have to actively seek it if you really want it.
What does "actively" seeking love mean to you?? What are you doing to find your other half? I'd love to hear your insight.
Not giving up yet,
C
I love this post. First off, I'm right there with you with the whole wanting to fall in love so bad it hurts. I've only been in true love once before, and I crave that feeling of security and companionship.
ReplyDeleteSecond, I'm constantly being fed that line about "finding love when you least expect it or aren't looking for it." Bull. Shit.
I spent a good semester alone, at home most nights. I wasn't in school and couldn't get a job. Most of my friends were away at school and always busy. I was a total hermit. Did I date then? No bc I wasn't actively seeking love!
So I agree with you that you have to try. You have to look, put in some effort. A relationship isn't going to fall out of the sky into your lap. I never believe the couples who try to tell me that they met and fell in love when they least expected it. No, you were both looking for each other, you just don't want to admit you were looking for love.
Amen sister! Thanks for the comment! :)
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