Has an ex boyfriend, hook up, best friend, any guy in general ever called you crazy?
My guess is yes because it is the most OVERUSED and OVERRATED word that guys say on a daily basis.
The first definition that pops up for crazy is the word mad. When I looked up mad at webster.com, this is the definition I've found:
mad (adj.) - arising from, indicative of, or marked by mental disorder
I've done a lot of shit that I probably shouldn't have in my life, but I do NOT have a mental disorder. (some of my ex boyfriends probably beg to differ). I may be sensitive, emotional, care more than I should, but that does not necessarily make me crazy. Having emotions and actually giving a shit about someone is different than just being a crazy bitch.....but guys put those two things in the same category instead of two competely different ones. I've done some crazy shit and people have made me CRAZY mad, but it is just soooo overused and exaggerated by guys that it drives. me. crazy. (ha).
I bring this up because of something that happened to my best friend and old college roommate this weekend. Her pen name is going to be Patron (self explanatory). :)
Patron and this guy (we are going to call him Pacific....inside joke..sorry) had an on and off weird ass love connection for three years in college. First of all, Patron is beautiful, smart, fun as hell, and this guy is not cute, and a pretty huge asshole but he is the life of the party and a fun person to be around so obviously there was an attraction. Pacific and Patron went to numerous sorority functions together, had a few sleep overs, and talked constantly. They were good friends.....but it was more than that and it was obvious to EVERYONE around them.
I've mentioned my college roommates before and I think I've made the point clear that we are a very obnoxious group. We are loud, fun, and wild. Yes, Patron may have been crazy in the party sense when she stood on tables, swung from a lamp, and stole couches off people's porch, but she really wasn't pyscho about Pacific.
I could drag out the entire history of Patron and Pacific to get the whole story in there, but that deserves a whole blog or book dedicated to it, so I figure that small synopsis will do. Long story short, he out of the blue cut off all communication with her all together for no apparent reason. There was no blow out fight, no parting words, just stopped communication. We found out later on that he was back with his ex girlfriend who cheated on him numerous times.....now THAT's crazy.
So anyways, this weekend we all reunited at our college town and were actually hanging out with some of Pacific's friends. One of his friends decided to get WASTED and kissed Patron on the lips out of nowhere at the bar. This was weird because he knows everything that happened with her and his friend, patron and this guy kind of hate each other, and it was out of NOWHERE. After he kissed her, he looked at her said
"Don't read too much into that....I know how you can get."
Naturally, she was pretty pissed. He knows how she can get? That only means one thing....Pacific ran his mouth about how crazy she was.
This wasn't the first time she heard this....she got a lot of shit from all of his friends about her being "crazy."
The only thing that made her crazy was how long she put up with his shit and that she liked him at all. He never took her on a date, brought his ex gf to a function that she was attending, and was so immature. She obviously got upset when he treated her completely different around all of his fraternity brothers than he did when it was just the two of them.
I can relate to this feeling, as I'm sure many of you can. Guys EXAGGERATE EVERYTHING. Have you ever gone out with a guy and asked about his past relationship and they responded with...oh yeah my ex...she was crazy. Really? Why was she crazy? Because she got upset when you blew her off for your friends every night of the week or because you never called when you said you would...or how about the fact that you CHEATED on her. RED FLAG.
She wasn't crazy. You were a freaking scum bag.
Caring does not equal crazy. So no matter how many times your ex calls you crazy, don't use that as an excuse for him treating you like shit. Asking to be treated with respect does not mean you are crazy, it means you have standards and that you deserve better.
Boom.
C
I could not have written this better myself! And I am so Patron in this scenario, both for the name and the situation!
ReplyDeleteT has basically dragged me along off and on for 4 years now and has probably told his friends I'm crazy (I see how they look at me) bc I had the courage to tell him how I feel and put my foot down about being his drunk hook up and nothing more! That doesn't make me crazy, that makes me have self respect!
M thought I was crazy bc I actually (SHOCK) cared about our relationship and his life and well being. But in his eyes, that made me clingy and psycho. Bc I cared.
I think GUYS are the ones who are crazy, NOT girls.
Amen girl! I agree 100%! Caring is not a crime!
ReplyDeleteI agree with this post so much! It pisses me off soo much when guys do this. My ex called me possessive and clingy because I got mad when he used to go out drinking with his friends instead on what was meant to be our date night (more than once).
ReplyDeleteI'm also known now among his friends as 'the psycho ex' (alongside his ex before me!). Stupidly, when we were together I believed that his ex was a psycho in that I'd hear rumours about them and stuff.
Now that I'm the ex, I can see that he just does this to cover up his own tracks, like texting me behind his fiance's back or still being involved with me when he has a girlfriend (at this point I thought he was single).
So therefore if I get mad and think, hang on, wait a minute, doesn't his fiance deserve to know that the man she's going to marry isn't committed as she might think? And if I chose to do the right thing and tell her of course she's going to dismiss it because 'I'm the psycho ex that makes up shit'.
Sorry that was so long but I just had to get it out because it's so nice to that someone else has put up with something similar and that NO we are NOT CRAZY!
:)
x