I'm guilty of overusing the saying "on the prowl," but to be completely honest I think that it describes my lifestyle right now pretty perfectly. I'm 100% absolutely on the prowl. Everywhere I go....the grocery store, work, the gas station, the beach, a hotel, a tourist site, the gym, you name it...I'm on the prowl. I'm constantly looking around, scoping out the scene and checking out the potential prospects that may be my future husband.
It's getting to the point where I'm slightly out of hand (some people would probably argue the slightly part).
My family and I were at a marathon volunteer event and I had scoped out every runner who was in my age range and stalked them out when they came to register. That's when it hit me. Actually, it really hit me when my uncle said......damn you are really on the prowl aren't you.
All time low.
Why yes, yes I am on the prowl.....and here I am....single as ever with zero prospects besides my flakey ex boyfriend.
Examples of how I am also on the prowl:
1. I constantly do laps at the bar and position myself next to the most attractive men to order a drink hoping they will spark up conversation or offer to buy my drink.
2. Every single guy that I meet at work, I immediately look at his ring finger and try to decide if he's gay or has a girlfiend
3. I've scoped out waiters in restaurants like it's my job and left my numbers on napkins.
There are so many other ways....more than I can count and some that are too embarrassing to have in writing.
Being on the prowl is super fun, exciting, and hilarious to write about but it hasn't gotten me anywhere. Sometimes I wonder if maybe I am looking too hard for something that has to find me.
That brings me back to an earlier post about finding love or love finding you. I had an interesting debate about this with a friend of mine and he gave me the usual advice of when you stop looking it will find you. My response was...."do you really think that my dream man zac efron look alike is going to fall out of the sky and knock on my door?" Probably not. But at this point I feel like my on the prowl has slightly turned into desperation. I want to find that special person so bad, and I probably am looking in all the wrong places.
A happy medium seems to always be the answer. I don't want to just sit on my ass and be completely oblivious about who's out there, but I also don't want to come across as looking too hard.
I want love to find me, and even though I'm on the prowl, I want to be pursued. It's hard to find that balance.
WHERE IS HE,
C
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Hummus does not equal romance
This weekend when I was visiting my friends, we were sitting on the porch talking when I spotted the newest addition of Cosmo. Of course I grabbed and started reading some of the corny articles out loud, especially about sex positions and "how to get your guy HOT." So freaking corny.
I came to an interesting segment listing dates to go on with your guy. I was reading them out loud to everyone and we were cracking up. I decided to post these unrealistic dates to twitter and I got some awesome responses. We were all in consensus.....no dude would ever go on half of these dates.
To give you some insight, a two of the suggestions were "find a bar with board games and play whatever looks fun" (What bar even has board games?!?), "search for the best hummus in town (WHAT GUY LIKES HUMMUS LET ALONE WANTS TO SEARCH FOR IT???).
Apparently dudes actually submitted these to a dating site where you post date ideas. My question is, how many dudes submitted the one about hummus? 2? 3? out of 37529837502957320 men in the world.
I'm not saying that all of the suggestions sucked. One was "go to karaoke bar." I love that suggestion. I've had some of the best nights with a group of friends at a karaoke bar.
I really just don't think it's possible to give everyone a list of dates to spice things up with their significant other. Every relationship is different ad every couple has their own thing.
I DO, however, think that there could be some suggestions for "get to know you" dates. Those first few dates with someone tend to be really awkward because you don't really know what they're into yet, so you have to play it safe.
Here are some of my "get to know you" date ideas that have worked out for so far:
1. Happy hour
There is nothing better than a casual 5 or 6pm cocktail/beer with someone you are just getting to know. It's not too formal, you don't have to worry about eating in front of the dude, and if you decide your not into them, you don't have to drag it out forever. Two drinks and you can peace. Another bonus of this is that you can come straight from work which means you are probably dressed to kill ;)
2. Go on a walk somewhere
Disclosure: do not go into the secluded woods with some dude you do not know. Some cities/towns have really cool parks/places to walk. For example, where I currently live has a really nice, open riverwalk that is always crowded with people. It's great to go on a casual stroll and walk and talk. If you live near a beach or another cool trail this is a good way to go. But seriously, make sure it's during the day and that a lot of people are around.
3. A fun event
This is a little broad I know, but it really does depend on your interest. In cities there are always festivals going on.....maybe it's a restaurant festival, a music festival, an outdoor concert, wine tasting, beer festival.
Whatever it is, it's good to see how the guy reacts in social situations and if he's actually a fun time or not.
No offense Cosmo, but I don't really think that hummus or board games is the way to a dude's heart.....
C
I came to an interesting segment listing dates to go on with your guy. I was reading them out loud to everyone and we were cracking up. I decided to post these unrealistic dates to twitter and I got some awesome responses. We were all in consensus.....no dude would ever go on half of these dates.
To give you some insight, a two of the suggestions were "find a bar with board games and play whatever looks fun" (What bar even has board games?!?), "search for the best hummus in town (WHAT GUY LIKES HUMMUS LET ALONE WANTS TO SEARCH FOR IT???).
Apparently dudes actually submitted these to a dating site where you post date ideas. My question is, how many dudes submitted the one about hummus? 2? 3? out of 37529837502957320 men in the world.
I'm not saying that all of the suggestions sucked. One was "go to karaoke bar." I love that suggestion. I've had some of the best nights with a group of friends at a karaoke bar.
I really just don't think it's possible to give everyone a list of dates to spice things up with their significant other. Every relationship is different ad every couple has their own thing.
I DO, however, think that there could be some suggestions for "get to know you" dates. Those first few dates with someone tend to be really awkward because you don't really know what they're into yet, so you have to play it safe.
Here are some of my "get to know you" date ideas that have worked out for so far:
1. Happy hour
There is nothing better than a casual 5 or 6pm cocktail/beer with someone you are just getting to know. It's not too formal, you don't have to worry about eating in front of the dude, and if you decide your not into them, you don't have to drag it out forever. Two drinks and you can peace. Another bonus of this is that you can come straight from work which means you are probably dressed to kill ;)
2. Go on a walk somewhere
Disclosure: do not go into the secluded woods with some dude you do not know. Some cities/towns have really cool parks/places to walk. For example, where I currently live has a really nice, open riverwalk that is always crowded with people. It's great to go on a casual stroll and walk and talk. If you live near a beach or another cool trail this is a good way to go. But seriously, make sure it's during the day and that a lot of people are around.
3. A fun event
This is a little broad I know, but it really does depend on your interest. In cities there are always festivals going on.....maybe it's a restaurant festival, a music festival, an outdoor concert, wine tasting, beer festival.
Whatever it is, it's good to see how the guy reacts in social situations and if he's actually a fun time or not.
No offense Cosmo, but I don't really think that hummus or board games is the way to a dude's heart.....
C
Monday, May 14, 2012
I'm not crazy....you're just an asshole
Has an ex boyfriend, hook up, best friend, any guy in general ever called you crazy?
My guess is yes because it is the most OVERUSED and OVERRATED word that guys say on a daily basis.
The first definition that pops up for crazy is the word mad. When I looked up mad at webster.com, this is the definition I've found:
mad (adj.) - arising from, indicative of, or marked by mental disorder
I've done a lot of shit that I probably shouldn't have in my life, but I do NOT have a mental disorder. (some of my ex boyfriends probably beg to differ). I may be sensitive, emotional, care more than I should, but that does not necessarily make me crazy. Having emotions and actually giving a shit about someone is different than just being a crazy bitch.....but guys put those two things in the same category instead of two competely different ones. I've done some crazy shit and people have made me CRAZY mad, but it is just soooo overused and exaggerated by guys that it drives. me. crazy. (ha).
I bring this up because of something that happened to my best friend and old college roommate this weekend. Her pen name is going to be Patron (self explanatory). :)
Patron and this guy (we are going to call him Pacific....inside joke..sorry) had an on and off weird ass love connection for three years in college. First of all, Patron is beautiful, smart, fun as hell, and this guy is not cute, and a pretty huge asshole but he is the life of the party and a fun person to be around so obviously there was an attraction. Pacific and Patron went to numerous sorority functions together, had a few sleep overs, and talked constantly. They were good friends.....but it was more than that and it was obvious to EVERYONE around them.
I've mentioned my college roommates before and I think I've made the point clear that we are a very obnoxious group. We are loud, fun, and wild. Yes, Patron may have been crazy in the party sense when she stood on tables, swung from a lamp, and stole couches off people's porch, but she really wasn't pyscho about Pacific.
I could drag out the entire history of Patron and Pacific to get the whole story in there, but that deserves a whole blog or book dedicated to it, so I figure that small synopsis will do. Long story short, he out of the blue cut off all communication with her all together for no apparent reason. There was no blow out fight, no parting words, just stopped communication. We found out later on that he was back with his ex girlfriend who cheated on him numerous times.....now THAT's crazy.
So anyways, this weekend we all reunited at our college town and were actually hanging out with some of Pacific's friends. One of his friends decided to get WASTED and kissed Patron on the lips out of nowhere at the bar. This was weird because he knows everything that happened with her and his friend, patron and this guy kind of hate each other, and it was out of NOWHERE. After he kissed her, he looked at her said
"Don't read too much into that....I know how you can get."
Naturally, she was pretty pissed. He knows how she can get? That only means one thing....Pacific ran his mouth about how crazy she was.
This wasn't the first time she heard this....she got a lot of shit from all of his friends about her being "crazy."
The only thing that made her crazy was how long she put up with his shit and that she liked him at all. He never took her on a date, brought his ex gf to a function that she was attending, and was so immature. She obviously got upset when he treated her completely different around all of his fraternity brothers than he did when it was just the two of them.
I can relate to this feeling, as I'm sure many of you can. Guys EXAGGERATE EVERYTHING. Have you ever gone out with a guy and asked about his past relationship and they responded with...oh yeah my ex...she was crazy. Really? Why was she crazy? Because she got upset when you blew her off for your friends every night of the week or because you never called when you said you would...or how about the fact that you CHEATED on her. RED FLAG.
She wasn't crazy. You were a freaking scum bag.
Caring does not equal crazy. So no matter how many times your ex calls you crazy, don't use that as an excuse for him treating you like shit. Asking to be treated with respect does not mean you are crazy, it means you have standards and that you deserve better.
Boom.
C
My guess is yes because it is the most OVERUSED and OVERRATED word that guys say on a daily basis.
The first definition that pops up for crazy is the word mad. When I looked up mad at webster.com, this is the definition I've found:
mad (adj.) - arising from, indicative of, or marked by mental disorder
I've done a lot of shit that I probably shouldn't have in my life, but I do NOT have a mental disorder. (some of my ex boyfriends probably beg to differ). I may be sensitive, emotional, care more than I should, but that does not necessarily make me crazy. Having emotions and actually giving a shit about someone is different than just being a crazy bitch.....but guys put those two things in the same category instead of two competely different ones. I've done some crazy shit and people have made me CRAZY mad, but it is just soooo overused and exaggerated by guys that it drives. me. crazy. (ha).
I bring this up because of something that happened to my best friend and old college roommate this weekend. Her pen name is going to be Patron (self explanatory). :)
Patron and this guy (we are going to call him Pacific....inside joke..sorry) had an on and off weird ass love connection for three years in college. First of all, Patron is beautiful, smart, fun as hell, and this guy is not cute, and a pretty huge asshole but he is the life of the party and a fun person to be around so obviously there was an attraction. Pacific and Patron went to numerous sorority functions together, had a few sleep overs, and talked constantly. They were good friends.....but it was more than that and it was obvious to EVERYONE around them.
I've mentioned my college roommates before and I think I've made the point clear that we are a very obnoxious group. We are loud, fun, and wild. Yes, Patron may have been crazy in the party sense when she stood on tables, swung from a lamp, and stole couches off people's porch, but she really wasn't pyscho about Pacific.
I could drag out the entire history of Patron and Pacific to get the whole story in there, but that deserves a whole blog or book dedicated to it, so I figure that small synopsis will do. Long story short, he out of the blue cut off all communication with her all together for no apparent reason. There was no blow out fight, no parting words, just stopped communication. We found out later on that he was back with his ex girlfriend who cheated on him numerous times.....now THAT's crazy.
So anyways, this weekend we all reunited at our college town and were actually hanging out with some of Pacific's friends. One of his friends decided to get WASTED and kissed Patron on the lips out of nowhere at the bar. This was weird because he knows everything that happened with her and his friend, patron and this guy kind of hate each other, and it was out of NOWHERE. After he kissed her, he looked at her said
"Don't read too much into that....I know how you can get."
Naturally, she was pretty pissed. He knows how she can get? That only means one thing....Pacific ran his mouth about how crazy she was.
This wasn't the first time she heard this....she got a lot of shit from all of his friends about her being "crazy."
The only thing that made her crazy was how long she put up with his shit and that she liked him at all. He never took her on a date, brought his ex gf to a function that she was attending, and was so immature. She obviously got upset when he treated her completely different around all of his fraternity brothers than he did when it was just the two of them.
I can relate to this feeling, as I'm sure many of you can. Guys EXAGGERATE EVERYTHING. Have you ever gone out with a guy and asked about his past relationship and they responded with...oh yeah my ex...she was crazy. Really? Why was she crazy? Because she got upset when you blew her off for your friends every night of the week or because you never called when you said you would...or how about the fact that you CHEATED on her. RED FLAG.
She wasn't crazy. You were a freaking scum bag.
Caring does not equal crazy. So no matter how many times your ex calls you crazy, don't use that as an excuse for him treating you like shit. Asking to be treated with respect does not mean you are crazy, it means you have standards and that you deserve better.
Boom.
C
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Goals of Summer
Summer is the season for love, so in honor of May 1st, finals winding down, and the 90 degree weather, I have compiled a goal list for my summer of love:
1. Find a man with a boat
It's summertime, I need to get a tan, and what's hotter than a shirtless man steering a boat?
2. Go on at least 3 first dates
You can't find love if you aren't willing to take a few chances. I want to go on at least 3 first dates to get myself in the habit of putting myself out there and exploring my options.
3. Give people a chance
After these first dates that I go on, I'm not going to write people off for the superficial reasons that I usually do. I'm going to try my hardest to not be sickened by little things.
4. Make out in a bar
Do I even have to explain this one? It's a summer must.
5. Hold out on sex until I'm seriously committed with someone.
I'm sticking to my promise in a previous blog about not hooking up with someone until I'm dating them. This could be hard in the summer because flings are aplenty and guys look SUPER sexy with a tan, but I have to resist!
And in honor of the season....
If I could also find a man that looks like Justin Timberlake, that'd be pretty clutch.
Summertime and the livin' is easy,
C
1. Find a man with a boat
It's summertime, I need to get a tan, and what's hotter than a shirtless man steering a boat?
2. Go on at least 3 first dates
You can't find love if you aren't willing to take a few chances. I want to go on at least 3 first dates to get myself in the habit of putting myself out there and exploring my options.
3. Give people a chance
After these first dates that I go on, I'm not going to write people off for the superficial reasons that I usually do. I'm going to try my hardest to not be sickened by little things.
4. Make out in a bar
Do I even have to explain this one? It's a summer must.
5. Hold out on sex until I'm seriously committed with someone.
I'm sticking to my promise in a previous blog about not hooking up with someone until I'm dating them. This could be hard in the summer because flings are aplenty and guys look SUPER sexy with a tan, but I have to resist!
And in honor of the season....
If I could also find a man that looks like Justin Timberlake, that'd be pretty clutch.
Summertime and the livin' is easy,
C
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